GLOBAL Forums

Sorry Chris, I've had a look at how I restore your original post but IDK how to do it/if I can. My bad.

BREAKING NEWS: I wrote this to help the later match/angle. Its purpose was to set up the match, and it did its job.

BACK IN BUSINESS: I dug this segment. I admit I’ve been a little lost with some of these past segments, but this is starting to pull them together. I am looking forward to seeing where this goes. A small thing of mine would like some of the harder curse words <bleeped> out due to the thought the show is on cable. Easy to look past, though. I just bleep them in my head as I read them.

SIGN OF MEETING: Something is building for later. The segment has me wanting to see what is going to happen.

TWO GIRLS, ONE DEBUT: Some character work here. Well written, as always.

THE MASTER SISTERS V BEST OF BRITISH: Dick Kick City attempts galore here. Aleczader gets involved here, and we have some shenanigans. OR - perhaps the HOFer is so mighty; even his foam finger is that deadly?

ADVERTISEMENT - SAND: Sand!

DORITOS: I do not want to read about Doritos being horny.

TEA FOR THREE: Much effort has been placed into the Lee/Button build. Where will this eventually go? I hope wherever it goes; it helps Amber Lee. I still say she becomes a crazed stalker! Run, Alfie!

PHONE CALLS AND HOT DOGS AND STREET FIGHTS, OH MY: Okay, that title is a mouth full! More in-depth character interaction - building into Queen and Angel. I am looking forward to that PPV match.

OUR PEAK: Some post-match frustrations from the Master Sisters. Things continue to get a bit personal as we head into PPV land.

‘THE FAT MAN’ STEVE DUNN V THE GREAT WALL: Okay, I am really confused with the Wall’s storyline in this arc! He debuted and looked dominant. Next show, sold to Dream. Then he is booked to rebuild vs. The Fat Man. His story is all over the place! He picks up the win. Tune in next week to see the wild ride of The Great Wall!

NURSE, NURSE! (1): Jerry David and E Z Rah is GLOBAL’s OG feud, which continues to live up to the hype and respect this feud has been getting. You can see the handlers and characters' chemistry with their feud. Wait - this segment has gone dark; bruising of the penis? Lots of comedy mixed in with feud elevation work. This a prime lesson of getting a lot done with a small segment heading into the PPV. A+

IT WON’T REYN: I am a fan of Son of Malta, so I am glad to see him get a segment in. He hypes up the match with Reyn later in the night.

‘LEGEND’ SEAN DARRING V CHRISTIAN PIERSON: I like the commentator's banter. This is a prime example of the benefits and context you don’t get when commentators aren’t around! It is already adding flavor to both men's challenges in this match. The match is written from an interesting perspective that oddly fits the Christian Pierson character well. The match benefited both characters, and that is what you want. It continued to show Pierson's mental challenges and inexperience but also his raw potential versus one of the most experienced veterans in the league. It was another big win against one of the top prospects for Darring as he heads into the PPV. Well done to the match writer.

A PARTY AT APARTMENT 3F: Another PPV match is tied up, and the show looks stacked.

DORITOS II: Doritos better give GLOBAL a lot of money for these advertisements. I guess this is how we afford Aleczander’s contract.

ADVERTISEMENT MAGIC: gmail.net? Wait a second. You had me totally believing in magic until that.

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN: This writer masterfully draws the reader in with the characters' interactions. The newcomers lay down a challenge, and wrestling 101 says someone will accept it, but who?

TROUBLE ROXX V ???: That didn’t take long. I wonder if we should have left the actual debut for the PPV, though. It doesn’t matter now, and we have a match next.

TROUBLE ROXX V TEAM UNITED: Short and solid debut match for the girls. I am looking forward to seeing what is in store for them down the road.

RICHER AND BETTER? NAH…: A lot to unpack here… But it appears the bridesmaids are complaining! I like Best and Alfie, and I am glad to see some fire and retribution heat post-matches with Dream and Darring.

T.N.T. V ALF ALFERSON: Alf Alferson continues his winning ways! Watch out, Alex Reyn and Daniel Dream; he is coming for the top spot! In all seriousness, there are some inside jokes here I am not privy to.

THE GHOSTS OF CHRISTMAS PAST: The Man-Child Jed Johnson. Sheesh, such high maintenance.

DEATH AND LIFE: I love me some Pierson. Awesome promo that followed the earlier match. When the character gets going, he is going to be a force.

CRUSADER X V DARREN BEST: This match made Crusader X look like a force at a good character's expense. I figured X would win, but I hoped for more from Best.

PHYSICAL COMPETITION 2: Okay, my segment and I need to reiterate. Before I planned a two-show angle like this, I had yet to learn that the Strength Competition would be used last show. If I had, and if I had known it would been done so well, I would have called an audible. Even writing this one felt repetitive, and I tried to make the best of it since the commitment was made already last show to the angle. Oh well, you win some, and you lose some. I accepted the failure here.

ALECZANDER THE GREAT V PAUL SANDERS: All hail Aleczander in another dominant performance.

FREDDIE GETS SHOT: Good promo that sells others in the fed. As someone who always thinks about the bigger picture when writing, I respect this promo.

DANIEL DREAM V EL PRINCIPE: I wrote this match so that I won’t say much. I hope it got the stories I was asked to tell over.

Nurse, Nurse! (2): If one great segment for this feud wasn’t enough, we got another one. Rah and David have been one of the better feuds of the arc. They showed up on the go-home show big, and I can’t wait for their Last Man Standing PPV match!

JED JOHNSON V VALORIE VITALITY: This match was well-done. Both characters had moments in them and a good ending. I also dug the use of the commentators.

HALL OF FAME WHINING: This appears to be out of place segment. I have grown to accept these will happen with the model we have in place. Accepting that, the promo is done really well; it sets up the big PPV match we knew was coming. If Rah and David were the feud of the arc, this was a possible runner-up.

AMBER LEE V KID CHAMELEON: More story work on the Lee/Kid stuff. This match went much longer than I expected it to.

ADVERTISEMENT DORITOS III: Why did I read this in a Marlyn Manson-type tone? I don’t know.

SON OF MALTA V ALEX REYN: It happened as I expected. I would have liked to see SOM get a more sell job here. He is built as this tough-nosed fighting veteran. It wouldn’t have hurt Reyn’s character to have SOM look bigger here. SOM wasn’t squashed, but I felt more meat was on the bone.

GLOBAL SHOWDOWN: I was a part of this, but this was a fitting end setting up the PPV. There is some intrigue here with all three guys, and you can see a path for any of the three to win. Well done Dream and Reyn.



OVERALL THOUGHTS:

I don’t want to go on too big of a rant here, but I think we are being WAY too critical of people's grammar in feedback. Sure, if it’s typo-filled and a real problem, that is one thing. However, when did e-wrestling become a professional writing course? If we know what a handler is trying to do and it doesn’t take away the enjoyment of one’s segment, what is the real problem? I will get off my soap box, but I have seen a lot of nit-picking on these types of things across the board, and the nit-picking of people’s segments actually drives me crazier than the small grammar mistakes people make.

Some of you may be professional writers. I will never claim to be one myself. I make my money doing something different and writing for fun. We should also not make others that aren’t native to English or have strong expertise in English writing feel unwelcomed. I know it’s probably unintentional, but I have never been in an e-fed in my 20+ years in this game that focused so much on grammar. We don’t want to discourage people and come off as grammar elitists. /Rant over.

The Good: I liked that there was more oomph in the match department on this show. It felt like a good “go-home” show.

E Z and David’s segments were great.
PPV matches were tied together, and we have quite the PPV lineup.
Christian Pierson was a joy to read with his match and post-match segment.
Rich Family segment was really dang good!
More commentators are being used!
Global Showdown tied together the PPV Main Event.

I was disappointed again with having to do a second Physical competition after the first one didn’t work last show. A few toss-away segments on a go-home show weren’t needed or could have been saved for the next arc. (TNT - ALF, GREAT WALL-STEVE DUNN, TROUBLE ROXX - TEAM UNITED?)

I think it was another solid 6/10 effort. Some fantastic segments, some angle tie-ups, a few out-of-place segments, and a few unneeded segments for a go-home show.

Great work, everyone, and it was a pleasure to finish an arc with you as we head into the PPV.

I will defend my use of Trouble Roxx by saying a. I wanted them to debut big, but also b. I didn't want to take up a precious slot at the supershow with an unproven team.

Thanks for the feedback

pdbnb wrote: ↑Mon Feb 06, 2023 4:15 pm I will defend my use of Trouble Roxx by saying a. I wanted them to debut big, but also b. I didn't want to take up a precious slot at the supershow with an unproven team.

Thanks for the feedback

For sure, and I think it's important to keep in mind that someone who is giving feedback obviously has no context on the true thoughts behind the plan. I thought it was all good work!

BEST MATCH: Don't make me pick but if you're going to make me pick, Crusader X and Darren Best.

Sean Darring vs Christian Pierson was an interesting match, Trouble Roxx vs Team United was a fun debut for Trouble Roxx, Amber Lee vs Kid Chameleon, Jed Johnson vs Valorie is always a fun contrast of styles and I love seeing Jed evolving his moveset to keep up with Valorie.

I think The Mark said it best about my pick, Darren lost because he did the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time to the wrong person and move. Either competitor could have won on any given night which is perfect for bringing in tension to the match, making someone invested in a match. I can imagine these two rematching in the future.

BEST SEGMENT: OUR PEAK

BEST LINE: "Bottle…" Aurora says, defeated, looking at her water bottle, now on the other side of the room completely spilled.

Everything about The Master Sisters are working for me. From Aurora drinking water and trying to sit down despite being the only sister to not wrestle, to Dawn turning over the table and her 'creative' vocabulary, to them using The Best of British in a sense. I can't wait to see The Master Sisters be dominant tag team champions. I can't wait to see them hit their peak.

ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT: I feel like the segment placing was a little off. Aleczander defeats Paul Sanders, Daniel Dream vs El Principe takes place, Jed Johnson vs Valorie Vitality takes place, then the next segment a pair of officials help assist Paul Sanders out of the ring. I feel logically that should have happen immediately after Aleczander defeated Paul Sanders. Otherwise no complaints.

Spot on, Hector.

Apologies my end. A few other things stood out to me afterwards, no excuses, and something to work on for the PPV.

BREAKING NEWS – Great opener, Sean comes in, match is set up, hypes opponent and teases things to come. Effective and succinct, I liked.

BACK IN BUSINESS – John Truth is going to be a lot of fun I can tell. Nothing says good old fashioned family entertainment like an unhinged conspiracy theorist. Difficult to know if it’s going to go more crazy hobo or comedy character at the moment but this one seems to juggle both fairly well.

SIGN OFF MEETING – Love a fool proof plan, they always seem to go of perfectly. Great character work on display here and the best of British always continue to be entertaining. Stella in my mind is Joanna Lumley and I can’t seem to shake that image.

TWO GIRLS, ONE DEBUT – Meeting these characters in person makes me wonder if they’re the big deal they were hyped up about at the end of last show. I like them though, Global has enough brooding badasses so seeing some characters with glaring insecurities is a nice change. I was slightly worried it was going to devolve into a underwear pillow fight at one point.

MASTER SISTERS VS BEST OF BRITISH – Fun match as the plan comes together. I think I missed something here though, If the sisters didn’t want to lose the match, why try and get DQ’d from the low blow? And if BOB wanted to get DQ’d anyway why not just let one of the low blows land?

SAND – Man this made me hungry. Did you know you can go to your local beach and eat as much sand as you want? It’s not illegal and no-one can stop you.

I – Doritos is way more than the snack I had originally pegged it for. It’s no longer welcome in my home.

TEA FOR THREE – More Alfie and Amber interactions, gives a nice bit of backstory.

PHONE CALLS AND HOT DOGS AND STREET FIGHTS, OH MY! – These two are fun together, a mechanic I rarely see in efedding and I’m enjoying them as characters. Angels mannerisms and speech are all very believable as well. Hyped for the PPV match

OUR PEAK – The Master Sister are pure chaos at it’s finest so I always enjoy there stuff. Will be interesting to see where this story goes as well.

STEVE DANN VS THE GREAT WALL – Impressive win by the Great Wall, being built up again after that first loss. I did wonder about his foundations after that defeat but it seems he’s firmly planted. Guys built like a brick outhouse. Going to be a tough one to get over.

NURSE, NURSE! (1) – Last week was so intense I just wanted to give a bit of a breather before we go all out next week. Fun to put E Z in a situation that is beyond his usual level of control as well. Also E Z nearly received 3 Jerry low blows from Jerry last week so I wanted a bit of continuity, I mean it’s got to hurt right?

IT WON’T REYN – Felt like I started watched a program a few seasons in and didn’t get any of the references. Son of Malta angry was pretty easy to get though.

SEAN DARRING VS CHRISTIAN PIERSON – I like Darring, reminds me of a proper old school face, definitely the right choice to go over here and who I’ll personally be rooting for at the PPV. Match itself took a while to get used to

PARTY AT APARTMENT 3F – Nice way to set up another match at the PPV and a good introduction to some more roster members. Bout time we got some rednecks in.

YOU – Doritos is love. Doritos is life. Long live Doritos.

MAGIC – Man that banner looked badass. I like magicians.

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN – These guys are basically walking pop culture references which people are either going to find really irritating or enjoy every moment. After this encounter I’m currently in the latter camp so looking forward to seeing more of them in the future…immediate future apparently.

TROUBLE ROXX VS TEAM UNITED – Good debut for Trouble Roxx, these guys are already showing a hell of a lot of character and charisma in such a short time.

RICHER AND BETTER? NAH… - Alfie brings up a good point, he’s frequently featured in matches high up the card.

TNT VS ALF ALFERSON – We all saw this coming from a long way away. I’ve been looking forward to this, what many have described as a dream match, for decades now and boy howdy did it deliver. Reminiscent of Stone Cold Vs the Rock at Wrestlemania X7, or K-Kwik Vs Rhyno on Sunday Night Heat. Truly a battle for the ages.

THE GHOSTS OF CHRISTMAS PAST – Good ol’ man child Jed Johnson

DEATH AND LIFE – Christian be crazy. There’s a few people with a screw loose in Global so will be fun to see their interactions.

The latter half was quite match heavy which I'm not the best of reviewing so I'll just give some highlights:

Freddie gets shot... Good set up and continues a few storylines

Nurse nurse (2) Not just because I'm currently working with Scott but genuinely one of my fave segments in Global so far. A great example of how to develop, escalate and build hype for a feud in a short segment with no unnecessary bloat. The mix of aggression and comedy works well too.

Hall Of Fame whining Great natural progression of the feud and showing how dangerous this new stable is. Hyped for the match at the PPV. Though it does strike me as quite odd it's become a number one contenders match with no mention of that here, it's a good enough angle to stand on its out without any additional stips.

The rest of the show does some good work to get the excitement going for the PPV so great work all!

Stella in my mind is Joanna Lumley and I can’t seem to shake that image.

You're not far off, actually, but it's KERRY who is blatantly based on Joanna Lumley's speech and mannerisms. Stella is Liz Hurley as the Queen in The Royals.

eeting these characters in person makes me wonder if they’re the big deal they were hyped up about at the end of last show.

Job well done, then.

I think I missed something here though, If the sisters didn’t want to lose the match, why try and get DQ’d from the low blow? And if BOB wanted to get DQ’d anyway why not just let one of the low blows land?

The Sisters were so angry they were not thinking straight, I don't think (also, it's Carnival, so it's likely she neglected to tell the others and didn't think it through.) And Rupert definitely did not want to take THAT one for the team, even for the sake of the plan.

Legend wrote: ↑Mon Feb 06, 2023 3:44 pm SON OF MALTA V ALEX REYN: It happened as I expected. I would have liked to see SOM get a more sell job here. He is built as this tough-nosed fighting veteran. It wouldn’t have hurt Reyn’s character to have SOM look bigger here. SOM wasn’t squashed, but I felt more meat was on the bone.

Would you mind elaborating on this, because making SoMlook strong WAS one of my goals, so I'd like to figure out where I went wrong and what I could do differently next time.

Alex Reyn wrote: ↑Tue Feb 07, 2023 2:00 pm

Legend wrote: ↑Mon Feb 06, 2023 3:44 pm SON OF MALTA V ALEX REYN: It happened as I expected. I would have liked to see SOM get a more sell job here. He is built as this tough-nosed fighting veteran. It wouldn’t have hurt Reyn’s character to have SOM look bigger here. SOM wasn’t squashed, but I felt more meat was on the bone.

Would you mind elaborating on this, because making SoMlook strong WAS one of my goals, so I'd like to figure out where I went wrong and what I could do differently next time.

Sure, the big moments of the match felt like Reyn. The memorable moments were designed around Reyn. Again, I said that SOM was not squashed. He didn't back down or look weak.

But, from my reading POV - this was the main event, and there was a sell job of history between the two men leading up to the match - I felt like it could be a place we could have seen SOM have a little shine.

I don't recall any of his signature spots even being used. I also take this from the point of view of who wrote an earlier match for SOM and his PPV, where I spent a lot of time selling his veteran experience and toughness. To capitalize on that, how would it look if he got in some of his spots on Reyn before going out?

Some of those leg kicks... Some of his close submission moves. Maybe teasing the Maltese Cross that has been sold as one of the deadliest submissions in GLOBAL...

It wouldn't have hurt Reyn and had only raised Malta heading into the PPV.

The match was well written, and I want to say it again. SOM was not squashed. Just some food for thought.